Attorney Michael de Broglio on: South Africa, Law, Politics, Attorneys, Sport, Photography, Technology, Gadgets, Media, Crime, Road Accidents Fund,
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I try to bring up my children on the basis that when they have done something wrong, they learn to say sorry. We all make mistakes and the best and quickest way to deal with a mistake is to apologise for it and to say sorry. Some people seem to live in a world where they don’t believe that they ever make mistakes, and are continually trying to blame others around them, rather than accept responsibility for their own mistakes, learn from them and move on. Quite frequently those people will in fact be the first to say that they always apologise when they are wrong but as luck would have it, they are never wrong – although they don’t say that latter part!
There is no doubt with modern communication we all get ourselves into even more problems than we should or would have in the past. That instinct to reply immediately to a rude or aggressive e-mail that angers us so often leads to a reply that we would not have sent in years gone by when we had more time to reflect on what you were doing. I, in particular, get very worked up on occasion by some of the e-mails that I have received in the past from clients. It upsets me no end that some people, in an effort to achieve whatever their goals may be, are quite happy to absolutely ignore the truth of a matter, the facts as well as possibly their own actions in a matter and simply try to threaten to damage one’s name or reputation in an effort to achieve a result. Lawyers are often threatened by clients or people where there is no real effective remedy for the lawyer, because the client has no money, and suing them for defamation is not going to achieve anything because of that. I know some major firms have made policy decisions that they will not react to any complaints, for example on Hello Peter or on social forums and I sometimes think, even though we get very few of those, that that would be the appropriate way for me to deal with them as well. Invariably, people who have genuine complaints will either sort it out with the firm themselves or go to other attorneys and it is somewhat frustrating trying to deal with somebody, who is totally to blame, but will not see it, and who tries to put a one-sided version up on a website in an effort to embarrass or extort you into taking certain steps.
Posted by Michael de Broglio on Monday 08-Sep-14
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Comments
Van said:
on Thursday 25-Sep-14 11:39 AM
Clients are less arrogant when you apologise. In fact, some are surprised by the apology and are not sure how to react :-)
What still boggles my mind is the retail business ...when a customer complains, they take far too long to apologise. They actually try to justify themselves which just upsets me even more. I hate being rude but they mostly deserve it because the word 'sorry' isn't in their vocabulary!
If I can apologise when I am wrong, they have no excuse.
Safia said:
on Monday 15-Sep-14 12:19 PM
I totally agree with David. the faster, the better and the bonus: you will sleep better that night because you have said sorry and wont toss and turn all night feeling guilty.
Sinead said:
on Friday 12-Sep-14 04:47 PM
I hate conflict so I always try to apologize, even if I wasn't in the wrong... I really don't like it when people can't acknowledge when they have done something wrong...
Angelique said:
on Thursday 11-Sep-14 01:54 PM
"Sorry seems to be the hardest word" said best by Elton John. I think I learned a lot throughout the years working at a steady company and one of the things is to learn to say sorry. Not only at work but also with relationships, it stops one from back and forth fighting/arguments and even though its one of the hardest things to say, especially if you are as stubborn as I am it really is the best thing one can say especially if you wrong and sometimes when you are not. This is usually the case when I am having an argument with my boyfriend. A saying I read recently was "Would you rather be right or would you rather be happy?". I have more respect for someone who steps up and apologises.
Elektra said:
on Tuesday 09-Sep-14 12:24 PM
I have stated before in a previous blog comment, I will admit when I have done something wrong and own up to it. That being said clients threatening to or even trying to sabotage your Company's name in an effort to obtain whatever it is that they are trying to achieve, sometimes forget in the process the wrong they are doing and are in no way going to apologize for it.
Lourien said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 01:58 PM
I found that most people find it very difficult to say the words "I apologise as I have made a mistake..." The best why to solve any problems, are to recognise the mistakes that has been made, accepting responsibility and being able to find a better solution to resolve the matter.
Anna said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 01:57 PM
I hate to apologise. That being said, it's often just easier to get it over an done with. Time wasted on fighting unnecessarily is time wasted. If a mistake has been made and it can be resolved, rather look at finding a solution than moaning about what went wrong.
Clare said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:58 PM
I think its easy to say sorry to someone, but a lot of people don't forgive and forget very easy, they hold your mistake agents you for everything.
Brumilde said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:57 PM
Well when you say sorry you have to mean it. Some people just say it to get the matter over and done with but they never really mean it... and then do it again. the word then loses all meaning to you
Brenda Du Toit said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:56 PM
If i made an mistake i will apologize what i have done wrong and move on .We all make mistakes
Thabitha said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:51 PM
We all make mistakes but the biggest problem is accepting your responsibility to some people
david said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:41 PM
I deal with clients all day, every day. i learned long ago that the faster you apologize, the better. No one is perfect, we all make mistakes, and the faster that you deal with those mistakes, the better the outcome.
Sally said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:33 PM
We all make mistakes as we are all human and to apologize is the right thing to do, but to some people an apology is not enough
Melissa said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:30 PM
I agree with Alexis when I am wrong I will go and apologize, but when the other person is wrong I will not say sorry especially when they think they are everything and better than someone else. For such a person I have no respect no matter how old they are. Always treat people the way you want to be treated.
Marisa said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:29 PM
Honesty is the best way to go, do not leave what you have done and hope it will go away, just be the bigger person, say sorry and then forget about it, because if you don't apologise then your wheel wil turn and bite you on the but..
Bianca R said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:25 PM
If you've made a mistake, apologize and get on with it. Everyone makes mistakes and we're all human. It is far more admirable to see someone take responsibility and apologize than to shift the blame continuously.
Alexis said:
on Monday 08-Sep-14 12:07 PM
If I am wrong I am wrong, I will apologize, rectify what I have done (if I can) and move on.
If you beat around the bush and tell more lies on top of the one you did, it never ends well and escalates into something a lot bigger than if you had just dealt with it in the first place.
Johannesburg based attorney specializing in personal injury matters including Road Accident Fund claims and medical negligence matters. My interests include golf, reading and the internet and the way it is constantly developing. I have a passion for life and a desire for less stress!